Many of you are probably wondering this. A sonnet is a lyric poem in a single stanza consisting of fourteen iambic pentameter lines linked by an intricate rhyme scheme.
My Ode to Marshmallow Matey’s is a poem, not a sonnet. Irregardless, me, Becky and Steve was talking about sonnets (and Steve was correcting me all along), and then I is like, “Hey, this aint a sonnet.”
I hate living in the same house as an English major. All they are good for is correcting your grammar and telling you to shut up when they are reading Chaucer. Why can’t I blast gangsta rap while you are reading Canterbury Tales? You can read out loud while I paint if you want.
Juilius Sharpe quote:
I went to college. I did the smart thing and majored in English. That prepares you for your future, because unemployment forms are in English, so are bank warnings and eviction notices. Seriously, if I had known I was going to be this poor I would have studied Spanish. (Not nice, but funny)
It’s a great country when you can go to a college for 4 years to study English, when you already speak English. When you get a diploma, that’s like saying “Congratulations — while you were at college, you didn’t forget anything.”
English should be taught with a corresponding math course, “Calculating Credit Card Interest at 19%.”
I’m using my knowledge to write a book about my standup career called “When Will the Big-Lipped Jew Say Something Funny?”
The only thing an English major is good for is so you can be that ass who corrects everyone’s grammar.
“It’s not Jeff and me, it’s Jeff and I.”
Actually, both me and Jeff hate you, because you’re always correcting our grammar.”