Today is a special day at Arizona State University; it is the fine day when new parking decals go on sale. Since good parking spaces at ASU are coveted like the pelts of baby seals, it’s a pretty big deal. Some brave souls literally camp out in tents in front of the decal sales office; other students join together in a concerted hour or two of incessant, profanity-laden calling of Sundial, ASU’s touchtone telephone system. I was one such student, as was Greg. Here is a dashed off email I received from Greg at about 7:20 this morning:
I want to die. I’ve heard “the line is busy” like 600
hope you are enjoying your time…
I had a similar experience except I made the attempt via cell phone. I decided to use TJ’s because he has unlimited minutes. At 7:25 I started my frantic dialing and redialing, hoping to get a spot in the caller pool. In an ungodly stroke of what, at the time, seemed like good luck, I got through to Sundial within the first two minutes. I leaped from my chair and, quite literally, waved my hands like I just didn’t care. The joy bubbling from my heart could not be contained. You could have told me I had a terminal illness or that Gilmore Girls had been cancelled and I wouldn’t have cared, such was my exuberance at having a crack at parking structure 1 (the most coveted of all parking locales).
Neigh halfway through entering my license plate information, TJ’s cheap-arse Cricket phone DROPPED THE CALL. The painful, bitter disappointment only served to increase the frustration during the next HOUR AND A HALF of busy signals I sat through. About every half hour or so, one of the phones (eventually I started calling on my phone and TJ’s phone simultaneously) would ring through. I imagine it was a ploy from Satan himself because right after I would drop an excitement-induced load in my pants, I would realize that the phone was just going to ring for fifteen minutes without an answer. Freakin’ Sundial…
Eventually, when everyone and their mom had secured parking passes, I managed to get through. After screwing up on the menu two or three times, I scored a pass and the whole ordeal was over. On the bright side, my new lot is closer to my classes, on the down side, it’s a lot and not a structure, I have a brain tumor from extended cell phone use, and, oh yeah, I killed TJ. Thanks Sundial, for staining my hands with the blood of the sleeping innocent!