Well, apologies for no entry at the wee hours of the morning when I normally post. I had some extenuating circumstances that prevented the normal high quality entertainment from being created last night.
Let’s begin at the beginning, where all good, traditional, linear narratives begin. Friday evening began with a social transgression. I told a professional (and presumably homosexual) hairstylist that my mom cuts my hair and that I don’t like women’s fashion unless it is being put to good use on a girl in front of me. I think I offended every possible sensibility the man had. Nice guy, but when I suggested that the result of inhaling his favorite hair product was akin to side effects of sniffing glue, I think I pushed him over the edge.
Some may wonder how I got to a trendy hair salon on Mill on a Friday evening and I would be inclined to tell them it’s none of their business, but I feel at this juncture that revealing more serves the story. I went with Greg to pick up his cousin who was getting her hair done and who we were to hang out with that night. You see, “Dani” as we’ll call her, is going away to Seattle for college in a few weeks and we had to have a last hangout time with everyone.
A bunch of people got together at the apartment…more people than we’ve had over ever before. We went to Rally’s for yum, Cafe Boba for, well, what else but boba, and other parts of Mill for general amusement. Mill again, you say? Mill indeed. I never claimed to be original, alright.
Here are some excerpts from the evening, some true, some false. See if you can discern which is which (answers can be had by clicking more at the end of the post).
a) Everyone is shocked/entertained by out of control Brazilian hoochie dancers
b) One of my roomates has an embarrassing mishap with the public toilets in Tempe beach park that involves a lack of toilet paper and bowel control.
c) Sixty percent of people are dissatisfied with their Cafe Boba experience.
d) A smooth, hulking African-American man seeks wisdom and understanding from our group regarding current bad standing with his girlfriend due to excessive consumption of alcohol and weed.
e) Kara gets Steve a complimentary cup of water from Coffee Plantation.
f) At the apartment, Steve goes insane from having to watch the Moonites episode of Aqua Teen Hunger Force for the umpteenth time and shuts his head in the refrigerator door repeatedly.
g) Lindsay unintentionally pilfers Candi’s keys and Steve, being a kindhearted friend drives Candi not only to her apartment on the other side of town, but also back to Tempe the next morning at 8 to get her car, causing Steve to be tired and want his mommy.
Thanks for playing the fun true/false game…now see how you did.
a) True…strange but true
b) False…may my chums forgive me for even suggesting such an event, but I couldn’t stop laughing at the thought of it
c) Sadly true
d) True…I don’t buy his repentance, but affirmation from several female members of the party probably assisted him in getting his groove on later in the night…sad
e) True, bless her heart. Shame on Bethany for denying my request (I think she was kidding, but I’m still bitter). I kid, I kid.
f) Half true. I never want to watch another episode of Aqua Teen Hunger Force again after being subjected to them repeatedly at every gathering for the benefit of those who don’t have Cartoon Network or the inclination to stay up and watch the fine programming in the Adult Swim programming block.
g) So very true…me need nappy.